Making time for the Writer

Writing can be lonely and all consuming. As a writer you can spend hours and hours of your life haunched over a laptop or in my case a clipboard with a stack of loose leaf paper. You are consumed by the need to just tweek that chapter a little bit more, to do a spell check one more time, to make sure that phrase is worded just right so you can live with yourself. It's an ugly web we weave.
I read in one "how-to" writer book last year that we simply need to concentrate on our work and stay focused on that alone. The book actually recommenced to let things go, work till the paint peels off the walls and then you deal with life after your writing is done. To me that is not going to happen. Am I supposed to tell my five year old to wait a few years for that cup of water? Do I simply move my bed to be closer to my work station? No.
I know it is so easy to be wrapped up in your book/work and to let the world simply fall away. In doing that you loose connections with your family, friends, peers and of course yourself. Sometimes you simply have to "kick out" the people in your head and put yourself first. So that I am not consumed by my book I have special days. Thursday is nail night. I take the time to paint my nails and hang out with my husband after we tuck the kids into bed. I try to stick to this every week so that way I can connect to the people that mean the most to me and I don't forget WHY I wanted to write in the first place.
If you simply set aside a few nights or hours a week for "you" time it will help you feel more in touch with those around you and you can still get your work done. It doesn't have to be anything major. A bowling night once a month, a video game night once every couple of weeks, maybe you call a friend every Monday morning just to talk ( I do that one!), or you can simply snuggle up with a loved one and watch some TV.
What's important is that you still have a life after your book is finished and that you haven't lost yourself. Your characters are important, but when they start to take you over it's time to slack off and find yourself. What else this time off gives you is a chance to experience life. If it makes you feel better think of it as field research. Get out there and experience things. After you have had some time to yourself settle back in and work. You will be amazed how just a few simple hours away from things can change the way you think and feel. Pages will zip by and your characters will stand up and take notice. After all you are the one in charge, not them.