Edit, Edit, Edit.......

I have done it! I have finally started editing my book! I put my excuses away and told my husband that I was indeed working on my book and not just sitting at my kitchen table listening to itunes through the laptop. (who does that anyway?)Needless to say he was shocked. I haven't worked on it in ages. I am fairly proud of myself, and I plan on doing again today.

Now that I have tooted my own horn for actually doing something let me just say after all this time I am reading it with new eyes. The one thing that is staggering is how I just simply "gave up" and it shows in the text. I have found myself wincing at some of my narration and I am very much dissapointed with myself. To be honest in it's current state I wouldn't let anyone read it. The last "edit" I did was a hack job. I ripped the soul out of my work! I am ashamed that my grammer perfecting OCD screwed my work. Yes, the sentences are beatutiful in their correctness, but really nobody speaks "correctly" and when reading pages upon pages of perfectly worded grammer it becomes flat and dry. Akin to reading an applicance user manual. Yuck. I have a LOT of work ahead of me, but I look foreward to it, and I will savor the chance to correct my mistakes to make my book "alive".

The moral for this post is Yeah you might of screwed your entire book up, but YOU are the writer. You are the dreamer of this dream and it is yours to do as you wish with it. If you want rainbow colored cookies to fall from the sky while pony ninja's are fighting perfect pretty-pretty princessess to over throw the pony's slave masters go for it! This is a lesson I had to re-learn.

ADHD/ADD

Remember

Today is the 11th anniversary of the 9/11 attacks. Of course leading up to this day there has been heaps of programs on the T.V.and articles in the papers to remind us all of that tragic day.

I remember where I was at when it happened. I had a 3 week old baby boy (my first born) and I was nursing him while watching our small 11 inch T.V. in our bedroom when the "breaking news" took over. It took a moment for what I was seeing to sink in. They were showing the demise of thousands of people on live T.V. It was like watching a war zone; I could not absorb all of the content. I was stunned, shocked and overwhelmed.

I live in Tennessee which of course is no where near New York or any of the other sites, but I remember my heart being lodged in my throat for all of those people that were involved. I knew that I wanted to help those in need, that while we didn't have much I would gladly give what I had to those that needed it. The local churches of course started to donation drives for clothing, non-perishable food, bottled water, first aide supplies, money and volenteers to go to "Ground Zero" to help. I wanted to go help, but I was still recovering from having a baby and so me and my husband opted to donate. We gave clothes, blankets, towels, food, and money. Understand at that time he was working at Wal-mart not making very much money. Things were tight for us, but still we gave.


The non-stop media coverage horrified me. All the dust, smoke, and debris from the twin towers seemed like it was from another planet. Then the news of the brave ones on the third plane came out and my heart broke again for those families. Their actions were simply stunning. Such breathtaking bravery shown by people I might of sat next to at the coffee shop, or stood in line behind at the store.

I remember the terror of that day and for the months that followed. The rumors that spread like wildfire and of course the non-stop media coverage. I remember them telling people to not call looking for loved ones because the phone systems were simply bogged down and were failing. The unknown was the terror of that day and the days that followed. Who knew if that was the only set of attacks? Who could tell us why they did this? Still most of the answers we sought of the attack were not given, but at least the families were able to get a small amount of closure.

Yes, all of this was tragic, but it also showed to us,as a country, what we had forgotten over the years. That we are strong, that we are truly one country united. I did not know any of those that suffered a loss on that day personally, yet I gave. I have never been to New York or any of the other sites, and still I gave. Why? Because they were in need. That is such a simple answer. I have NEVER turned anyone away that I could help. Nobody ever leaves my home hungry or thirsty. If you are in need simply ask and you shall be blessed. Why should distance affect their cause? We are all human and know how it feels to be hurt or sad or in need.

I know how easily things are forgotten in this fast paced media driven age. One moment we are watching Kitten videos and the next posting about our lastest and greatest whatever on Facebook. To honor those that were affected by the 9/11 attack we need to simply remember! My children were either too young to remember it or wasn't even born so it is up to us the parents to tell them! The schools will only do so much! Do you want your children to learn of this from a bland text book or do you want to tell them your 9/11 story so that they can know that part of their family history.

It was an ugly day, but it was a day we lived through and we should remember our fallen unsung heros who risked so much. Simply Remember.

Excuses

I know that one of most difficult things as a writer is actually making time to write. That's right, actually sitting down and doing it. I know that life still carries on. I am the worst at making excuses for NOT writing. "the kids have...." "I have to go get groceries today..." "The kitchen floor needs to be scrubbed..." I am an endless font of excuses.


So my excuses line up like good little soilders ready for war while my book lays moldering away thinking it's forgotten while I am digging through box after box looking for "that" candle holder Aunt Margret gave us when we got married 12 years ago that I haven't seen since we got married. "It would match the new couch perfectly!!" (insert my husband's eye roll here)

To all of us that have heaps of excuses quit cleaning your house and doing pointless errands and work on that book! Crack out those index cards and binders full of notes and put them to work! Clearly we are needed! Have you seen the new books being offered here lately?? Most are sad things that should be avoided if you want to keep all of your brain cells. Which is worse for a person; An awful book or a bong hit? I'm going with a badly written book.

An Adventure for Spiderwick

I sent my poor mother to Books-a-Million near her doctor's office today with an errand. My oldest son is in a book club at school and they are starting to read The Field Guide book 1 in the Spiderwick chronicles. This is one of the few youth series I have not purchased. If it was Harry Potter or the Lemony Snicket series we would be all set. So I sent her to the book store with my membership card and the book inforamation to purchase one for my sweetie.

She came back with a box set of Lomony Snicket!Books 1-3 in the series all in a neat little set for the cheap price of 45 bucks! Ouch!

Of course she was pissed because she had to return to the shop and it's a good 40 minute drive from where we live at. (Trust me I called everyone in town to see if they had it in stock or in a library. Everyone was out or had lent it out!) Also the only copy I could get on my Kindle is the audio book, which he can't take into a book club meeting! UGH!

So here's my rant. If your going to work in a book shop pay attention to your customers! Know the differences between all the popular book series. Lemony and Spiderwick really don't have anything in common other than they both have kids in the stories. I'm not even sure how you could mistake one for the other. How frustrating! Especially now with gas being so high a 40 minute one way trip into Nashville and then a 40 minute trip back really sucks up the money. I seriously doubt they will give her a $20 spot to cover her gas back up there. Before she had a reason to be in Nashville, she had a doctor's appointment.

Thankfully I was able to call the book shop before she left and spoke to someone there. I gave them the info of the situation and got them to hold a copy of the first book at the desk for her so that way there will not be any confusion. My poor mom doesn't know Lemony Snicket from Anne of Green Gables. Hopefully, she will return with the right book and he can get his extra credit.

Isn't it amazing how a simple trip to a book shop can turn into madness? Then again, with my family I am not surprised in the least. It seems like this kind of thing happens a lot. Were blessed with Confusion!

Potter Plotter Catching Fire

I have finished reading Catching Fire By Suzanne Collins, the second book in the Hunger Games Series. It was good!I really hated how unfair things turned out for Katiness and Peeta, so in hopes of a HAPPY ending I will read the final book in October when I can get it for FREE from the kindle lending library!


Now this brings me to a topic that is really a pet peeve of mine. I love series books. I truly do when they are done WELL. By "done well" I mean that each book contributes to OVERALL theme of the plot. A good example is the Harry Potter books. Yes they had heaps of stuff going on in each book, enough to make a tangled mess in the heads of the readers, but the overall goal of the stories was the Harry- Voldermort show down. Good vs. Evil. Even in the very first book you get a taste of it even though Harry was so young and Voldermort basicly a vapor. This theme continues in each book building a bit each time. The danger builds and the lure of even MORE secrets keeps the pages turning. Until the final book when the writer's job is to pull all those plot strings she or he has woven through many books to make one beautiful tapestry.

Now that is HOW it is supposed to go. And most writers somehow miss out on that idea and may have a bit of ADD because most book series are scattered and the only linking factor in between the books are the characters themselves. To me sometimes that is not enough. I need not only to be hooked on the charcters but also the story itself.

The first book in a series should be an introduction book. Kinda like a first date. Full of inforamtion and plot and of course lots and lots of narritive to set up the rest of the series. It's not an easy task to make sure the book is like a guide to the characters. After reading the first Harry Potter book you knew Harry's strong points and his weaknesses. It's is true he may have developed a few more of each as the story progressed; In this way the PLOT was supported for the series end game.

I could go on for days on this topic. Seriously. I hate it when the author drops the ball so to speak. To avoid this plan out your books in advance! Don't fly the seat of your pants. What is the overall ending you are wanting to achieve? What must happen in the story support this? Write all of this down and look at it often!! Sometimes I know we can get caught up by writing alone. It's just you and the keyboard. Your in chin deep before you realise you missed an important point that needed to be included. That means re-writes. Ugh. Or if your not so picky a crapy book. Nobody wants a crapy book.

I used index cards for my plot line. In chapter I this needs to happen.... Chapter II they discover...

It keeps ME FOCUSED and helps me remember my overall goals. It's like a map. Follow your map of index cards and you can't get lost!

Hard copy VS. Digital

My last post I covered hightlights of owning a Kindle or another e-reader device. Just let me say that no matter how much stuff they cramm onto a device sometimes just a good old fashion paperback or hard back book will do.

I have LOTS and LOTS of books. Some are signed and collectors first editions which are my darlings. I will do a lot for a signed copy of a First edition. Lord help me if it is an Anne Rice book. I am a book collector to put it simply. Nothing can soothe the soul quite like the weight of a good book in your hand and the smell of it's printed pages. It's like therapy after a bad day when life shows you that you are not quite the person you thought you are.

There are just some books you have to OWN physically. Not just the words, but it's presence. The lure of the jacket and art work of the book, the feel of the ink on the pages helps suck you into the story.

I will admit on a lot of books on my kindle are what I call "Junk books". They are interesting, and most of them are good reads, but most of them are books that I would of never physically bought in ANY bookstore. These are mostly from new writers that have not quiet found their voice, but are working on finding it. They may have a decent plot and fastinating characters, but somewhere among all the words they fail. They missed something while composing the story and it just fell apart. The story felt flat.

Because of collectors such as myself and the books that demand your presence in it's physical form will help keep bookstores from completely vanishing. I understand the need to save paper and help the trees, but some stories just require the death of a tree. There's no other way around it.

How will the book industry be overall affected by this digital age? I haven't the slighest clue how things will turn out, but be rest assured that books will continue to be written, reviewed and talked about and most importantly read! The printing press changed books forever and now our instant gratification age will also. Hey, I have woken up at 2 A.M. and decieded I NEEDED that certain book and I bought it via my kindle which deliveried it instantly. The key to all of this isn't the way the book, i.e. message, is delievered, but that it is delivered.

A kindle run down

BF could be your BFF

Since I hammered out a post earlier about the Transgender dad breastfeeding I thought I would do a post about my views of breastfeeding.

Let me go ahead and state that I have nursed 3 boys, my oldest is now 11 and my youngest is 16 months who I am currently weening. I have 3 different experiences with nursing all my boys. My oldest was a struggle because I was 22 when I had him and I was clueless. I had no support, no fancy pillow and I was pretty much on my own. I made it a little bit over 6 months before I caved to the formula temptation. My second child was MUCH different. He cried, and cried and the only time I could soothe him was while I was nursing. So nursed I did. I worked also, which means I pumped while at work and in-between his feedings while I was at home. My pump was my best friend. I nursed him for almost a year. It was a struggle. I had issues with his latching on, and yeast infections. I was stressed if I was pumping enough milk for him, if he was hungry while I was working, if my babysitter was heating the milk properly. I was one stressed out momma, and it was not a pleasent time for any of us. My youngest child was so easy! He latched on right away and it was perfect! I had a fancy pillow, and a decent pump which I hated to use. He is much easier to nurse and I will admit that it was still a struggle!

Nursing a child is no easy thing. I know that if your pregnant you will be pressured into at least trying to nurse for the good of your child because breast milk is the best, and it is honestly. It has heaps of good things for your baby in it that your body is making JUST for him or her. It's always the perfect tempture, it has the perfect amount of Fat and proteins in it unlike cow milk or formula. It helps your little one's gut develop and his brain grow! Nursing also bonds the baby and mom, and helps the mom recover from the birth. The biggest perk is no bottles to buy or expensive formula to suck your money out of your bank account. As I said, Lots of good stuff.

Even good things have a downside. Breastfed babies grow at different rates than formula fed babies so be prepared to get lots of worried looks from your baby's doctor, and comments from strangers (Oh my he is little! Was he a preemie?) Only you can feed him/her until you can start pumping which is roughly a month after you have given birth. You will leak like a faucet until your body settles into your baby's feeding routine. Be prepared to not get a full night's sleep for a while. My youngest is 16 months and he still wakes up at least once a night to nurse. I have adjusted to this lack of sleep, but I do long for a full 8-9 hours of sleep like a normal person would get. Be pepared to whip out your breasts in all locations. I have nursed in cars, malls, living rooms of my family, resturants, the park, the movies, at the drive-in, and the oddest place as of yet has been at a Banana Pudding Contest. Of course you try to be descreet and try nurse somewhere quiet with few distractions and that can be sometimes hard to do.

If I was a pregnant mom I would weigh the pros and cons before I commited myself to either formula or breastfeeding. Buy a book, do some research, talk to a mom who has breastfed; Basically do your homework. I am going to be honest. It is hard. The first 6 months are all about nursing for a little one. They are striving to build up fat and grow, and so of course they need a lot of fuel for that!

If you are going to nurse I recommend you not to purchase a single bottle or any formula. The hopsital will send you home with some, but don't use it. I kept a can of formula for almost 7 months before I used it and it was an emergency. I felt good knowing I had that there if I NEEDED it, but I kept it out of sight so I would not be tempted. Once you start formula it just goes downhill from there. If you can make it the first 6 months you can make it another 6 months. It flys by to be honest. After the first 6 months your baby will become more interested in trying to roll over and crawling than nursing all the time. They will start to discover the world and you and your breasts will get a much needed change in routine that will allow you some distance between feedings.

I know the major concern for new moms is their baby getting enough? Your body will meet your baby's demand with flying colors. As long as they have plenty of wet and dirty diapers daily you are doing it right! I know it's hard because you can't physically see what your baby is consuming, but you can see the results of it which is just as good. I kept a notepad handy to write down notes about feeding times, and diaper changes. When I was feeling tempted to fix a bottle of formula I read my notebook for support. It helped me be confident in nursing him.

The most important key thing a mom needs is SUPPORT! If your husband/partner is not supporting your nursing then you might as well forget it. Thankfully my husband was all for it ("Honey, you can nurse all you want! Formula is nearly $20 a can!). In short, or the long of it, if your are considering nursing really do your homework so you can be prepared, and talk to your doctor and husband about it. Don't be pressured into it. They make formula for a reason; Nursing is HARD and not everyone can do for a whole slew of reasons. Don't feel guilty if you are going to formula way. All that matters is that your little one is cared for and loved. The end result is the same with either option. They will grow, pee, poo, walk, talk and melt your heart.

The Fifty Hype

Hungry...

I just finished reading the Hunger Games book 1 by Suzanne Collins. Yes, I know I am a tad behind all the raging teenagers, but I have been busy! I actually rented the movie first from Netflix then read the book via my Kindle. I got it free because I borrowed it from the lending library. All three books in the series is currently free in the Amazon.com kindle library!

I must say that I was SURPRISED that it was written decently! I was expecting another "Fifty Shades of Grey" writing style. The book flowed well, and the movie followed it closely! I really did connect to Katniss and Peeta, and I really did not want any of contestants to die, but that is part of the Game. I will not spoil it for those who have not read it yet, but it was really good and I am eager to begin the second book in the series come September 1st. I tend to stray away from the most hyped up books because usually they are lacking. The Twilight books were awful to push through, but I did read them all except for the last one. I let me husband do that one all by himself. I couldn't force myself into that again. Even for him.

In closing I think if you like action filled books with plently of harsh scenes about death The Hunger Games is perfect for you. It does have some emtional overtones in it, but not enough to make me weepy. It is well written, flows nicely and again the movie follows it closely. The main difference is that they cut out some of the background on Katniss and Peeta, and Gale of course. They leave out the story about the goat which I thought showed depth Katniss and Prim's relationship and they shortened most of the character narritives. I adored Cinna and I wish she would of given more detail about Haymitch's own Hunger Game. Maybe in the next book. I am tempted to re-watch the movie now that I finished the book.

Breastfeeding is in the news Again

I have seen several news articles over the summer about Breastfeeding. The first was the photos that TIME magizine did of the Army mom's nursing while in uniform and now it's in the news again because of a Transgender dad wanting to be a leader of La Leche League in Winnipeg, Canada.

What happened is that he sent an e-mail to the La Leche League (LLLC) requesting it and the declined him because he is a man. Their rules states that a man cannot be a leader. Of course he is upset over this, and I can see why. He has breast fed his child for 16 months with the help of a feeding tube that allows him supplement his own milk. There's no shame in that; I have had to supplement my own milk before.

Here's my take on it. Transgender people tend to fall into a grey area. I have NOTHING against them or their lifestyles. I think that if that is what it takes for you to be happy and to live a productive self-fulfilling life then go for it. I am of course all for Breastfeeding, but as a mom that has breastfed three boys (I am currently weaning my youngest) I can see the La Leche League's point of view. Some mom's would simply be uncomfortable discussing nursing their child with a man who is not their husband. I had heaps of issues nursing my boys from Yeast infections, plugged ducts, engorement, plugged nipples and more. I didn't even feel like telling my husband how I cured the plugged nipple. It was a tad embrassing and gross.

This is my solution. Let him have a Co-Leader that is female! That way if another Transgender is attempting to nurse or considering to nurse the support is there! Also if the members of the League feel uncomfortable seeking a male for aide then he has backup, a female Co-Leader to handle those types of situations.

Breastfeeding Leagues should welcome ALL into their fold. Nursing a child is hard enough, let alone with no support. The first time I nursed my first born I did not know ANYONE else who was nursing and the hospital did not have a laction counselor. Also there is no league where I am located at. It was before it got popular. I was on my own. I really struggled, I just wanted my baby to sleep through the night. I was exhausted and so very unprepared. Now things are different and should be improved! There is no need for ANYONE to be shut out just because of a lifestyle choice.

I can see how his experience could aide new mom's. Why should they not allow others the chance to have that kind of wisdom at their fingertips because he doesn't fit into their idea of a Leader physically? How silly can you be? They need to readjust their rules to allow for MODERN times. Exceptions should be made. They, the LLLC, should be helping progess breastfeeding by whatever means a family has. Hopefully in the future they will adjust their rules and push foreward the movement of Transgender breastfeeding.

He has been writing about his struggle with the LLLC on his own blog at Milk Junkies. He is currently asking people to write to the LLLC about them needing to change their rules. Hopefully he will get enough support to push this much needed change through! Visit his blog and help out!

At last....

Were finally semi-setlled into the new house and I LOVE it! We still are unpacking, mostly items from our storage unit which is about 30 miles away so it is slow going. I have yet to set up an "official" writing area for myself so I am posting this from my kitchen table while watching it rain through my awesome bay windows! Having a new home is my dream. A place where I can raise my kids, and have roots. It's an awesome feeling. I have big plans for our yard and repainting in a few years. Sometimes I still feel stunned that we actually managed to pull this off. I will be folding clothes and it will hit me that I just washed and dryed clothes in MY machines and I am folding clothes in MY living room. It seems surreal to be honest. I am so proud of my home and of my husband. He made this possiable! He is my favorite person at the moment. I regret not posting as much as I wanted to, but a new house means a new routine to settle into. My boys are going to new schools, which means adapting to a new community's rythem and flow. So far things are going smoothly except for last Monday when I had to pick up my middle child from school early because he ran into a door and needed stitches. His first stitches! He got three on his right eyebrow. He was paniced of course, but he did really well. Minus the yelling he held very still and let the doctor do the procedure. He is such a trooper! So life for us is moving on. We have had issues as far as employment is concerned, but really who is not? Things are finally looking up for us, and hopefully some of the pressure will be relieved. The stress of making the house payment plus the other bills can be overwhelming. While all of this is running circles in my head my youngest baby is finally walking at 16 months! It is thrilling watching him take his first solo steps that reminds me of Frankenstein walking. If your wondering if I was concerned about him taking so long to walk I was not. Why should he walk when he has me, dad and two brothers to carry him around? Plus crawling is faster. His walking may be delayed, but his mouth is not. He talks all day, and sings, and yells. He is very vocal! I finally have decieced that it is time to begin writing again so I can once more have a purpose in life other than child related goals. When I was taking my "moving" break I did feel a bit lost, almost like was floating free with no connections. I envisioned myself as a bit of dandelion fluff lost in the wind. I do feel better since I have started thinking about my plot lines again, and of course what to post! Now to get myself to the storage unit to drag out my desk and my books. I do miss my books..

It's been a while...

I haven't posted anything for a while because I have been so busy. Thanks to my new little boy who is 9 months old I barely have time to sleep, muchless write anything, and I do mean anything. Even my husband has taken on the challenge of writing the shopping lists, which is confusing for me because he will put Water on the list but not what kind he wanted. Which results in me calling him while I'm shopping.

I haven't forgotten about writing, I still keep a journal for myself and that helps me sort through and process my day. A way to wind down after a busy day of breastfeeding, homework, cooking, laundry, and Lord knows what else. My days are a bit overwhelming to say the least.

On top of everything else we are curreently in the process of buying our first home. There are tons of stuff that is involved. It is a bit overwhleming to be honest. The biggest shock so far was how much the Home Inspection will cost us. $330! Wow huh? That doesn't even cover the septic,termite, and radon testing. Those will run us about an extra $225 bucks. Ouch. What got me was how quickly all the testing and inspecting has to be done. We have 10 days to get all this done. This after months of looking at homes, it seems like everything is in fast foreward. Were keeping our fingers crossed that everything will turn out well and we can be moving sometime in March.

If your writing everyday, even if it's a journal like in my case, keep on. Life will free up some and before you know it you will be writing that book that you always wanted to. Even if you just write down ideas once a week for your writing that's progress! See the cup as half full instead of half empty.